Sunday, December 13, 2009

Stranger on the plane

Sometimes, no matter how much you wish, you never strike gold and sometimes, very rarely though, lady luck showers her blessings generously on you. Some of you would be thinking that I am going to talk about some other film star whom I happened to bump into. Well, not so lucky but not bad either.

I was flying from Singapore to New Delhi and further on my way to home. I was excited ‘coz one, I was away travelling on business for almost 6 weeks and two, I was visiting home and was also looking forward to attend one of my best friend’s wedding. I was allocated 48H (an aisle seat) and this lady was sitting on 47H-another aisle seat. Well, can’t help but remember the details. :) I thought even today I was not lucky enough to have some nice company for the next 6 hours. But this time, when the opportunity came, I grabbed it. ;-)

There was a couple which was allocated separate seats-one in the 48th row and one in the 47th row. Of course, they wanted to sit together so, they requested me if I could move to the middle seat in the 47th row-next to the lady. My first reaction was NO. I always prefer aisle seats in a flight, particularly long flights because it is easy for me to walk around and visit the rest rooms if required. But, then I gave it a second thought and I am glad that I did so. I agreed and decided to shift.

The initial exchange was- “Excuse me” and she was prompt to get up and let me settle down in my seat. I saw her reading a book. And so, I also decided to open mine, “New Paradigm for Financial Markets”. After 5 minutes, she happened to ask, “Is the book that you are reading interesting?” Honestly, for a split second I was not sure if it was the woman sitting next to me who was asking that question. I, like a seasoned reader replied, “It is too early to comment. However, the book is a unique amalgamation of philosophy and financial markets”. She appeared interested or at least so I would love to believe and the next 2-3 minutes went in discussing about the book.

I told her that I had always been curious about reading about the recent financial crisis and that was the reason why I picked this up. However, I accepted that I was a Human Resources guy and have limited knowledge of finance. There is an automatic interest created the moment I tell someone that I work at Google. I am not blowing my own trumpet here but, it is a fact. This, in most cases, wins some talking points further. So, we discussed about my work at Google and I told her that I was an HR Analyst. By this time I thought it was time to introduce myself and we shook hands.

Let me call her N.

The next thing she told me was that she was afraid of flying. I happened to remember that movie, where the actresses go crazy in the flight and she quickly chipped in that there was nothing to worry about. There would not be any drama. I must say that throughout the flight there were few things that were really odd about her, like just staring at the flight path and the map, but I must say that she did a fairly good job of not showing her uneasiness and she remained poised throughout the flight. In fact, if she had not confided in me, there was no way I could have sensed it. However, I would have definitely found someone just staring at the flight path during a six-hour long flight really strange.

She told me that she worked in a bank. For a moment I wondered why she did not share that piece of detail earlier. But one thing good was that she did not make me uncomfortable with her knowledge of finance by throwing jargon at me. Not sure if she was really interested in knowing about what I was reading or, she was too scared of flying and whatever I was saying was falling on deaf years. However, after the initial discussion on the subject of financial markets, we did not broach the subject later. There were more interesting areas to explore. ;-)

For the first 45 minutes or so, we discussed about our interests. She told me that she loved travelling and then added herself that I would find it strange ‘coz she was afraid of flying. I shared some of my experiences from the Leh trip and she talked about her holidaying in Paris with her husband. By this time, the flight attendants had started serving. I suggested that she have some wine just to cool down her nerves. She narrated an interesting incident to me.

She was flying within Europe. She had purchased a couple of wine bottles thinking that the airport security would allow them as part of the cabin baggage. They allowed only one. Well, our wine connoisseur did not waste any of it. She drank three-fourths of the bottle leaving only one-fourth to her husband. Her husband and she were allotted different seats. She was assigned a seat next to an old lady who did not understand English. If the wine had just cooled down her nerves, it would have been ok. It just went a step ahead. She dropped all her inhibitions and scared the shit out of the old lady by behaving weirdly. So much so that the old lady had to request for a change of seats.

I am glad that she did not drink any wine. :) All that she had was a couple of glasses of Diet Coke!

I could not help making fun of her being scared of flying. I know I am insensitive at times. Though, it was all meant in good humor. She, I guess behaved in a civilized manner for some time. And then she said-“You are a jerk”. This statement and adjective was used many a times during the remainder of the flight. There was one moment where I guess I annoyed her and she said “stop fingering me”. I could not help it. I started laughing. She said she meant it “literally”. She wanted to say “figuratively”. That slip of tongue made me laugh even more. And then the statement, “You are a jerk” was repeated many times.

We were chatting and she was describing to me the kind of person that she was. She said she was a minimalistic person. I was surprised. I happen to be a keen observer. When I heard her say that she was a minimalistic person, I said it didn’t appear like that as she was wearing solitaires in her ears. I guess I was honed in being more observant to what women wear when I was in TISS. My foundation was strong and I was groomed well. She said that she was impressed. I happened to ask her the brand of the clothes and the watch that she was wearing. Incidentally, all those items were from big designer houses. That just went on to prove how ‘minimalistic’ she was. By the end of this, she was looking for the right adjective to describe her.

We discussed a bit about our respective families and friends and it so happened that she too like me enjoyed the company of friends and family. She told me that she was a happy go lucky person. And she accepted what life had to offer to her. She, to my surprise had an arranged marriage. I was surprised because I have not known too many people from B-Schools these days having arranged marriages. We discussed about some crests and troughs in life and about our respective break-ups-in her case before her marriage. I told her that I had a break up recently and then she started telling me about her own story. I shared some of the parameters that I was looking for in a girl. She shared with me how priorities change after marriage. She gave me the example of how she had to leave her job where she was doing really well and she had to relocate. There was one thing that she said that caught my attention. And I subscribe to the line of thought. She said that as long as two people are ready to make a marriage work, they will make it work. It might sound simple, but sometimes, we tend to miss the most obvious and simple things in life.

We also talked about some of our basic instincts. I must say that she maintained her poise throughout the conversation where some women could have been uncomfortable. Though, she did ask me if I was always so direct in my dealings with people, especially women. My reply was in affirmative. I told her that I have come across people who appreciate it and there are a few with which this approach bombs.

I still wonder how two total strangers could be so comfortable with each other. Or, I guess that is what you call life. You keep wondering and then you wonder some more. I may not even meet her in the future. I do not even know what she thought of me. For all you know, I could have been a real jerk. But for me, I did not have the fear of being judged. I guess, it’s important to let off your guard once in a while. And now when I look back, I am glad I did it.

5 comments:

  1. It is easier to open up with strangers than with people well known, for the fear of being judged. I completely agree with her, whether it is an arranged or a love marriage, as long as two people are ready to make a marriage work, they will make it work.

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  2. Nice one Sir...excellent narration...though difficult to believe that one can be so easy and comfortable with an stranger in just few hours of flight journey...but then it depends on individuals..and as you say that it is "Straight from heart"..thanks for sharing this experience...
    http://www.incubation360.com/humor/the-girl-next-door
    Read this one whenever you have time :) Pramod
    ...

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  3. yes, swathi!that's what i felt too!

    pramod, will comment on your blog in person!

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  4. Hopefully you got her number... :)

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